This title may seem somewhat unusual for a new widow or anyone who is grieving. However, life does seem to be about us at the time and it probably should! While we often reflect on others and why they are not helping us at the time, we tend to forget how little we may have done for others when they have lost their spouse. Often, it is because we had never walked down that path before and didn’t know what to do. Scripture reads: Acts 20:35 (NIV) In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’
As you go through this journey, I would encourage you to take notes or write a journal of what you are going through. A couple things will come across down the road as you read what you have gone through: First it will help you see how you are healing through this journey. Second, it will help you understand what may be helpful to someone going down the road. As you reflect, you will sense what helped you as you received from others, it will also help you to give to others down the road.
This is quite a process that does not have a time frame tied to it. You will need to be patient with yourself! Be patient with those who mean well and with others going through the journey of widowhood. I Timothy 5:5 (NIV): Now a true widow, a woman who is truly alone in this world, has placed her hope in God. She prays night and day, asking God for his help. I remember reading this scripture and thinking it was so superficial… My thought was God really doesn’t understand. As time went by, I really did realize God did understand! By resting in him, I learned a valuable lesson. The more faith and trust I put in God, the more he carried me though the journey.
The lessons I learned then, I am able to apply in today’s journey. This doesn’t mean each day is easy or perfect. What it does mean is, God is there for you and in turn you can be there for others going. Remember each of us is unique and walk the path a bit differently. With that being said, the pain of losing a spouse is similar.
Just talking with someone going through this, helps so much! As you are holding their hand and helping them through this, it doesn’t seem long before that person is holding a new widow’s hand. Luke 6:38 (NIV) reads: Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
I hope this helps you understand that by receiving help when you are hurting, turns into giving help to another widow going down the same path. God is with us each step of the way. We are here on earth to help each other. Many times it is someone who has gone through what we have gone through, that truly helps each of us.
May you feel the blessings which God had given you to bless others. Hugs and prayers to each of you. May your use the healing from your pain (no matter what it is) to help others along the way!
Blessings, hugs and prayers to each of you!